By Michael EhretLast month in my Novel Rocket post “You’re Invited!,” I began telling the story of my participation in Allen Arnold’s ACFW Conference class, “The Wildness of Writing with God.” You can click back and read the previous post or this snippet from it will set the stage:
|You're invited into The Story!|
I felt that familiar tummy turmoil as he walked around the room randomly handing out notebooks. Questions raced through my mind as anticipation and fear warred.
Then Allen set a notebook in front of me. My notebook. And I knew it was not a message from him—he was just the conduit. It was a message—an invitation—from God.
And I feared to open it.
Why did I fear?
For me the fear stemmed from knowing. I knew God had called me to write and I had purposefully been avoiding it since 2007, when an appointment with an agent at a conference took a dark, unexpected (to me), turn.
|"You'll never be a writer."|
The agent, one of the most respected in the field, read several pages. Enough that I was feeling a little confident. After all, the agent didn’t toss it right away, right?
“This is not publishable,” the agent said, with no softening preamble. “You’ll never be a writer.”
Truthfully, the agent definitely said the first part of that quote. Without a doubt.
I remain unsure about the second part. It certainly seems like it was said. In my head I still hear the agent saying it. But from what I know about agents and editors, particularly in the Christian market, I have doubts that it was verbally said.
But regardless, I heard it. And I believed it. And I let it cripple me.
My notebook inscription
|God's messages are all around us.|
“I’m inviting you into a new season of writing. Aslan is on the move! Have fun!” —God
See what God did there?
The agent was correct. My manuscript was not publishable at that time. But that isn’t what God addressed in His affirmation. He addressed what my heart heard and took inside, “You’ll never be a writer.” He poked my wound—to bring healing. And reminded me that His will for me should bring me joy, not fear.
And He didn't scold me for running from my calling. Before the conference, I asked God for a clear sign. Something that could not be mistaken. "Is this still something You have for me? I need to know."
And now I know. Will I ever be published? Well, first of all, I already am. Have been many times. Will my fiction be published? I don’t know. It’s in my hands, and it’s not. But I know this: I am a writer. I’ve made my living as a writer (and editor) since 1986 and I expect that to continue in this “new season.” God told me so.
Are you willing to ask God for a clear sign? And when (not if) He answers, are you willing to listen to what He says? What is He writing in your notebook? Don’t be afraid to open the cover.
Read the story I wrote for ACFW about Allen Arnold's workshop.
Michael Ehret has accepted God's invitation and is a freelance editor at WritingOnTheFineLine.com. In addition, he's worked as editor-in-chief of the ACFW Journal at American Christian Fiction Writers. He pays the bills as a marketing communications writer and sharpened his writing and editing skills as a reporter for The Indianapolis News and The Indianapolis Star.